Inspiring Designer Update & Kevin Federline's Memoir "You Thought You Knew"
In this episode of the Uploft Interior Design Podcast, I’m embracing the holiday spirit with my festive decorations and a recent snowfall that has me feeling cozy. I’m thrilled to announce the launch of my new TikTok channel tiktok.com/@uploftinteriordesign where I’ve been creating fun design content. I also read a heartfelt letter from Latoyia, a former student who has made incredible strides in her interior design journey. If you have questions for me, make sure to submit them here.
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[Music]
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Design inspiration, real life makeovers, and the latest in pop culture. This is the Uploft Interior Design podcast with Betsy Helmouth. >> Happy holidays. I am completely in the mood. Yesterday, we got a huge snow. Well, huge for this area. We got like 5
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in of beautiful, thick, amazing snow. It’s freezing out there. It’s like 17°, so it’s too cold to really enjoy the snow in my opinion. But just looking out the window, gazing upon it is doing the trick. Of course, I’m chilly, which is why I’ve got my Harry Potter vibe going
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on with my bright yellow scarf and my maroon sweater, but I need the warmth, and I am Gryffindor. So, there you go. Uh, what else? What else? What else? H I’ve been decorating up a storm. I’ve been adding and adding and adding. We’ve got so many boxes of holiday decor
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versus other different types of occasions like Halloween or Fourth of July where I do have a modest amount and I do like to celebrate in a decorative way. But for Christmas, I go all out. We have three trees. We have stuff down on the driveway the minute you turn in and
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it’s all matching the house colors. I went out and got a big natural wreath and decorated it with pine cones and other natury type things that match my yellow and teal decor. I am in the holiday spirit. And yeah, so there we go. What else is going on? Not
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much. Not much. And you guys must be slow, too, cuz the mailbag is relatively light. I just want to point that out there. Um, but that leaves me more time for some announcements. Guess what, guys? I finally bit the bullet and I am creating a Tik Tok channel. I hired a
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New TikTok Adventures
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college student who’s amazing and who Tik Toks for her sorority. Anyway, we hired her after putting a post on Facebook and she has been a dream coming up with all these great ideas and we’ve been going to HomeGoods and we shot at my house. So far, we have had a couple
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of shoot days and we made 35 Tik Toks. So, yeah. Yeah. Uh if you want to check out my foray into tik toking, first of all, be gentle, be kind, because these were my first couple of attempts. Uh but you can head over to Uploft Interior Design on Tik
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Tok where you will see me make a fool of myself, see me give legitimately amazing tips in my opinion, see me point out things at HomeGoods that I think you should buy right away. In fact, I left with quite a few of them. Uh anyway, we are having so much fun and I had to tick
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tock for the entire month because she goes home from college back to New Jersey for the month of December, January and we’ll be back for January at the very end in which time during which time, oh my gosh, we will create a new batch of Tik Toks for Valentine’s Day
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and beyond. but send me good vibes because creating Tik Toks is very much out of my wheelhouse. It turns out it’s not cuz they were so fun to do and it’s like podcasting but a lot faster. And it was fun to completely talk off the cuff and have no script and just be thrown
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prompts which is something of what I do on this podcast where people just throw me questions. But um certainly being at HomeGoods and trying to like dodge the fellow shoppers and the people that work there. Not that it was a problem that they saw me filming, but you just don’t
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want look walking behind being like, “What’s going on?” Uh it was very funny and surprisingly very fun. Uh so I got an alert that I had a new letter in the mailbag. I was so excited and it was such a holiday treat when I saw who it was. So, I can’t wait to read
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that letter to you coming up here in just a minute. And then in the second part of our podcast, I’m going to be discussing a book I just covered with my book club on Sunday, which was Kevin Federline’s memoir, You Thought You Knew. Believe it or not, this is one of
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the books we’ve rated the highest out of all the books we’ve been reading for years. It surprised me as well. Typically, we are true crime exclusive, but we opened it up to do Britney’s memoir. And then after giving our thoughts and having lots to think about on Britney’s memoir,
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when we saw Kay FedEd had come one coming out, we were like, “Oh my gosh, let’s do some checks and balances.” So, it was very interesting and um perhaps you will like this discussion as much as we liked the book. All right, without further ado, digging in to my letter
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Mailbag Update
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from this week. And guys, if you’re sitting there thinking, “How do I get my letter on the air? I want to tell Betsy something. I have a book she should read or I have a design dilemma and I need it solved right away because we’re hosting.” Well, you just have to go to
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uploft.com. Once again, that’s uplift.com and then you go slmpodcast or you can see the little podcast up there in the menu, but uplift.com/mpodcast. There you’ll fill out a quick form. There’s a place to send me pictures. There’s a place to tell me about your
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favorite book or tell me about your design issue and I will solve it on an upcoming episode. It’s what I live for. It’s what I’ve been doing for 10 years, but really it’s what I’ve been doing for over 20 years at my firm. So, you have a pro on your side and all of it is free.
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You’re welcome. Come get your free advice before the holidays. Okay, without further ado, unzipping the mailbag or as my toddler says, “Yep, we’re going to unip the mailbag.” Isn’t that so cute? She’s the cutest. All right, here we go. Here we go. This message is from someone that
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you guys may remember being on the podcast, a wonderful Latoya. So, not only was Latoya a podcast listener just like you, but then she became an academy member. her story of going from former military to government worker to then furniture store owner in a mall to then
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interior designer to then so many other iterations has been endlessly inspiring. Not only have I talked to her personally a handful of times, but she’s also been on the show and people write me, people reference when they’re talking about the academy with me Latoya’s journey because
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it was that inspirational. If you have not heard her previous episodes, make sure you search in this podcast for Latoya Smith because you will not want to miss her story. It’s really beautiful and amazing and she’s overcome so many hard things. And I was so impressed with
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her in the academy because from the minute she enrolled to the minute she opened a furniture company that also offered interior design services, I think it was as short a span as six months. Like she was taking out a lease on a commercial property within
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six months of starting the academy. That is impressive to say the least. So, if you feel like you want to start an interior design journey, but you’re just not sure how, you’ve always dreamed of being an interior designer, but you have roadblocks just like Latoya had. Don’t
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let them hold you back. Feel the fear. Do it anyway. Check out Interioresignacademy.com. That may be the place for you. But I am so grateful that Latoya found the academy. It was certainly the place for her. And let’s hear her update. She’s writing from Baltimore, Maryland. Betsy,
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it’s been a while since we’ve chatted and it’s Latoya, your old student from way back in 2020 2021. Man, has my life changed since finding you on a podcast during the pandemic. As you know, I opened a brick and mortar for a few years designing my furniture artistry,
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and I did great things in a short period of time. But having autoimmune disease, it pushed me to figure out a way to figure out what parts were not working for me and what I really loved. I had it in my head that I must have a retail space or no one would find me. But with
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multiple surgeries looming, it had to go. So, I built a space behind my home to work as a studio and continued to take clients without the overhead. And boy, was that the right decision at the right time. It freed me of the pressure of having to take every client due to
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bills. And now, guess what? I managed to not only have a spread in the international magazine, What Women Create, but Honey and I got the cover for winter 2025. It’s going to be on the shelves in Barnes & Noble as soon as December 23rd. I am over the moon and I’m so proud of
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how far I’ve come in my artistry. I do my sustainable interior design and my artistry because your academy gave me the tools to step outside of myself and to explore the potential to be an artist. Design is truly a form of art. I wanted to share this with you and thank
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you for what you’re doing and what you do day in and day out. I’ll attach some photos of my work and the spread. Get a copy and read my article. I wrote every word. Oh, Latoya, I am so proud of you. And I think there’s several takeaways from this note. So, I think the first
10:00 Celebrating Achievements
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takeaway is being proud of yourself. I know in my career, I’ve had highs, I’ve had lows, and I often forget to take the time to celebrate those highs, and then to truly feel in my bones proud of myself. There’s always that next thing to reach for. there’s always sort of a
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dark cloud looming behind the bright opportunity and sometimes I tend to focus on that rather than saying Betsy look at all you’ve done Latoya I’m so proud of you and I do think it catapults you and gives you a lot of courage to take the next step when you acknowledge
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all the bravery you’ve had already when you take time to feel the pride as well you should so first things first I’m sure many of you are listening and thinking, you know, I’ve done big things in my life. I’ve done scary things. I’ve got a lot of accomplishments. And even
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if other people don’t recognize them as goals that they’re interested in, it meant a lot to me to accomplish XYZ. Feel the pride. Feel the win before you reach for the next goal. Okay, that’s my first takeaway from here. My second is Latoya, I love that
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even though getting the retail space was the goal and you had a lot of expectations wrapped up in that in terms of how many clients you could get and then how many clients you would ultimately have to take that that sort of brass ring almost became a burden.
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The thing that I love, and I hate that your autoimmune disease had to signal this, but the thing that I love is that you did take that leap that you did say, you know, I’m going to evaluate this and see what’s working and what’s not working. Because sometimes, even when we
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accomplish our dreams, even when we get everything we’ve hoped for, maybe we didn’t see some of the parts that aren’t going to work for us. Maybe we didn’t imagine that we’re going to have to construct that dream. Have to edit it in a certain way so that it doesn’t
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become something that burdens us or that drains us. I remember when I started my company, I felt like to be a true interior designer, you had to do renovations. So, I started that way. When somebody said, “Betsy, I want to remodel my kitchen and bath.” I was
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like, “I am here for it.” And then I realized I was having no fun. Sure, I was making more money than if I’d just pick up furniture for people, but it was so much red tape, so much permitting, so much dealing with contractors, dealing with workers, being on site
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every day. Not only was it difficult to monetize, it wasn’t all that fun or artistic. And I decided, you know what? Looking back at the past few projects I’ve done that have all been renovation heavy, I have not enjoyed myself. This is not the dream I wanted for myself.
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why don’t I build my packages and plans around things I actually like to do? So, I let go of the renovations even though that was a great source of revenue and I have never been happier and have not looked back. Now, I’m not saying I wouldn’t evolve and do renovations again
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in the future, but I’m just saying that it wasn’t right for me then. I didn’t have the bandwidth then. And if I find that there’s an opportunity when it would be right again, I’ll be open. But I’ll also be a little wary. I’ll be evaluating how I feel when I’m in it to
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make sure I’m not having that same experience. And it sounds like that’s the exact same thing you’re going through, Latoya, where you’ve let the retail space go for now. You thought that that spelled success, but it turned out to be quite a burden. And you’ll
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re-evaluate if another opportunity comes along. But look at all you’re getting. When you make room for something different when something is sucking your time and energy and so you eliminate it, you do open yourself up to having more time to do something you might be more
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passionate about. And I love that you’re getting acknowledged in a broader way. Having somebody recognize your endeavors, especially somebody in the press, is just such a special cherry on top. I will warn that it’s not something you should want or need. Those outside kudos
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come easy. Sometimes come hard, but it is external validation that may not have a lot to do with how you’re feeling inside about where you are on the journey. But when those two align, when you’re feeling proud of yourself and somebody acknowledges it and gives you a
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platform, wow, it is such a high and I am so proud of you. So, I know that this has been a long hard road. Well, actually, the road hasn’t been that long, Latoya. Let’s be clear. You have done a lot since 2021, but I know that you’ve had to face a lot
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of obstacles, including your autoimmune disease, to get this far. And I am so proud of you, guys. This is another
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Latoyia’s Success Story
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thing you can do. You can write into the podcast and say, “Betsy, I am so proud of myself. Look what I did.” Or, “Look at the room I designed following your rules.” Or, “Look, look, look, whatever.” I love it when people take the time to let me know what’s going on
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with them because here I am podcasting in the middle of nowhere Connecticut in a tiny cottage. But I want to know what’s going on with you. I want your updates. I want to hear what’s lighting you up in the design world. Thank you, Latoya. Keep us posted on your journey.
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And guys, head over to Barnes & Noble and pick up a copy of What Women Create. I can’t wait to get mine. And if you’re watching on YouTube, we’ll be posting some pictures of Latoya’s furnishings and also of Latoya so you can see her. You can get a sneak preview before you
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run out and buy that magazine. All right, part two of this podcast. We’re going to be talking about Kevin Federline. I never thought I’d say that in my whole life. I don’t think I’d given Kevin Federline two minutes of
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Kevin Federline’s Memoir
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thought until I read his memoir. And I’m glad I did. It was very interesting. So, first things first, I read Britney’s memoir. I think I covered it on this podcast. Um, the thing that stood out is that she well, it’s been a while since I read it and I read a lot. By read, I mean audio
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books. I don’t actually sit down with a real book, but um I devour a lot of content, whether it’s podcast or audiobooks. And so, it’s been a long time since I read her book, but I distinctly remember that she passed the buck a lot. She had like four ghost
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writers, three three who quit during the process and one who managed to hang on. And it was obviously told through her lens. It was as she was getting out of the conservatorship. She was saying she was doing a lot of vitamins rather than drugs. We all know
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she got a little cuckoo for cocoa puffs there in the as it didn’t always feel genuine. Additionally, I absolutely hated that Michelle Williams was reading it because we love Britney because she’s a little unhinged. She’s open. She’s fresh. And Michelle Williams just felt so buttoned
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up. And it felt like that memoir was a little buttoned up, too. I wanted to see the raw parts of Britney. I wanted to see the exposed parts. I wanted it to feel more true and real. And with Kayfed’s book, Kayfed’s book is called You Thought You Knew. And I will tell
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you there were no major revelations in this book for me. I did think I knew I did think I knew that Britney was a hot mess. And she was. The thing that surprised me is that Kayfed really threw her under the bus. The first half of the book I found to be much more interesting
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when he was talking about sort of his work as a backup dancer because people love to dump on kayfed and I think rightfully so. He has a reputation for just being a major stoner, somebody who was kind of just writing the coattales of her fame, but he did have a lot of
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talent in his own right, which I think people forget. You know, to get to the level where you’re backup dancing for Michael Jackson, where you are going on tour with LFO and even being on the same stage as Britney, you do have to be pretty good at your craft. He came from
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really humble beginnings and managed to work his way up in Los Angeles to a pretty successful position if you ask me. And I don’t think that should be discounted. And I don’t even think he gave himself enough credit for that piece of his journey at the beginning of
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the book. He kind of rushed through it. Now, was I impressed that he was a baby daddy to six children with three different mamas and he kept touting himself as like this great dad. And yet his first two kids with Char, he basically just left for her to raise.
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and then his two kids with Britney, he was raising and doing a lot of work, but at the same time he was doing a ton of drugs and he was out, you know, producing his album, talking with Snoop Dogg. I mean, and then part two of the book, he is trashing Britney. like really trashing her in
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such a way that led me to believe, well, not led me to believe, I mean, he says it outright, that he was also trashing Britney in front of her children. He was telling her children, Jaden, your mom likes your brother better than she likes you. And I’m sorry, that’s a really
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horrible thing, but you just got to face it. Like, what? You did not tell a young child that. Maybe you talk to Britney about that. Maybe you see if you can mitigate that in some way. But trashtalking their mom, even if they’re coming to you with some wounds that
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she’s created, in my opinion, is not the way to go. He took every possible opportunity to throw her under the bus. He talked about how many drugs she was doing while she was breastfeeding. And that’s not okay. I am not condoning any part of that. But I’m also not
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condoning the fact that he was out blazing with his bros. I mean, these are exact quotes. Uh, one of his quotes was, um, I’m going to blaze. That’s who I am. It was just such a double standard that she is a mom now and she should not be doing any drugs and she should be more
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nurturing and more available and yet I’m going to go on a tour. I’m going to promote my album. I’m going to be out at the club buying drugs, taking drugs across international borders. I mean, what? I just thought that that was so tonedeaf and I thought it would have been really
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more compelling if he would have taken some accountability for his own actions. Um, you know, I keep up with Britney even though I was never a fan. I was never a fan of either of these people. I don’t know. I just love pop culture. But I keep up with her on Instagram and yes,
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she’s been unhinged. She’s had the videos Dancing with the Knives. She’s always scantily clad, wearing basically underwear and dancing around. I mean, she’s kind of stuck in the same age and mentality of when she was popular and on stage, and that’s essentially what she
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was wearing. So, you kind of feel like she’s frozen in time, but it’s really sad as she’s maturing. I mean, she still looks fabulous, but she looks crazy at the same time. And she’s spouting crazy things and typing crazy captions. And so, I don’t feel like she should
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necessarily have custody of her children. I don’t feel like though Kay Fed is saying all this horrible stuff about her that he’s lying. But it just feels like the mirror is not
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Final Thoughts on K-Fed’s Book
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reflecting back his own situation. Now, he’s found a new woman. Now he’s madly in love with Victoria and they’ve been together for many years. I think like 12 years. They have two children of their own. I just wasn’t impressed with his point of view,
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but I could not put this book down. I could not stop listening. When it finally ended, I was sad, which I always take as a sign that I’m really enjoying this book. Uh, it’s a very quick read, less than 300 pages, less than 5 hours if you listen on 1.25 speed, which I
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highly recommend because he does have kind of a slow cadence. But I love that he read it himself. And I love that I got to understand him just a little bit more, his dynamic with Britney. And if you’re just looking for something like fun to listen to in the
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background while you’re driving kids to carpool, well, maybe not. It It does get a little racy. Okay. while you’re going grocery shopping alone, while you’re headed to the mall to do your holiday shopping or returns alone. Uh, listen to this because it was good. It was good. I
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was interested. Uh, there you go. All right, everybody. You’ve got questions, you’ve got book recommendations. Head over to uploft.com/mpodcast and let me know what’s going on. Until next week, happy holidays. A big thanks to our producer Jeremy Young and to Eton and the Embassy for
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our theme music. And shout out to our parent company, Uploft Interior Design, your trusted source for expert interior design. Visit uploft.com to explore our services and book a consultation with one of our talented designers. If you’re enjoying the Uplift interior design
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podcast, please support us by sharing the show with friends and leaving a five-star review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen. It’s the best way to help new listeners find us. Thanks for tuning in and we’ll see you next week with more pro tips and pop culture dish.
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